Collaborations of Abstraction

You and whose army?

Posted on: February 10, 2010

A friend of mine (I won’t name names, but he sometimes writes on this blog) told me about this website The Vigilant Citizen. It’s like a car wreck: you want to turn away but you just can’t.

(I wasn’t even going to link to it originally, but I thought why not? I mean, in the grand scheme, does it really matter? It’s so entertaining. Some people like reality TV. Others: celebrity magazines. Me? Bad pop music and conspiracy theorists. Combine the two and I’m salivating.)

There are several posts on the site about the Illuminati using pop stars and rap artists to build up their army. When I read that I thought, What better type of people to populate your army with than spoiled, self-absorbed celebrities? I just don’t see how having the Black Eyed Peas on my side in battle will do anything for my morale.

So what kind of people do I want in my army? Here are the qualities I would like in a recruit:

Optimistic. Idealistic. Able to take a punch. Friendly without being fake. Open-minded. Likes candy. Shows gratitude. Has, at one point, held a job and gone to school (or held more than one job simultaneously). Will laugh at themselves. Seen the movie Fight Club. Not afraid to get wet. Can spend an afternoon alone without getting bored.

What I’m fighting for doesn’t really require soldiers. Recruiting takes a lot of time. And training’s a bitch. So I’ll just sit back and let Rihanna and the Illuminati do the work for me. Then maybe I’ll swoop in with my superior mind control and take over the world. You’ve been warned. Just sayin’.


2 Responses to "You and whose army?"

one sec…..

so am i a recruit now 😉

The site is suppose to make you think, for me it just made me laugh.

When i was in Chicago i spotted this

Chicago Board of Trade

Now who are the two shady guys supposed to be?

Well you do have all the qualities I’m looking for 🙂

Hmmm conspiracy theorists unite!

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Collaborations of Abstraction

Two close (though, unfortunately, not in proximity) friends – a Welsh man living in Ireland and a Minnesotan woman living in Germany – come together to share musings, wit and random things of interest in this journey called life



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